Have you been questioning about the differences of the roles and social status between women and men in Taiwan?
If “Yes,” what differences are they?
Could you give
some explanations and examples you’ve been going through or you’ve observed or
heard from others?
If “No,” why are you so sure?
Will you please scrutinize what
is really going on? Please be objective when you do that. It really is about
gender, nothing about sex discrimination at all, if you’re pleased with
what I’m going to say.
Stories of Kiku and Anna
Anna was brought
up in a family, traditionally and non-traditionally. The traditional parts were
things like thoughts of son preference or the timing of marriage, etc.
Nontraditional ones very unusual came from the beliefs
of her mother, Kiku. She enlightened her daughters when they were still little, to receive
higher education in order to have their own careers and be economically independent. Kiku also convinced her daughters that money earned by their own would bring them the mental
independence too.
You might have a doubt, tittering or giving a hearty laugh, about why the way Kiku raised her daughters was declared extraordinary. You look around and you believe that it is very usual nowadays. But in retrospect, there were only a few stay-at-home mothers in 1960s in Taiwan who inspired her daughters to achieve their goal.
You might have a doubt, tittering or giving a hearty laugh, about why the way Kiku raised her daughters was declared extraordinary. You look around and you believe that it is very usual nowadays. But in retrospect, there were only a few stay-at-home mothers in 1960s in Taiwan who inspired her daughters to achieve their goal.
Kiku assured of her daughters the
more educated they were the brighter future they would be guaranteed. She was
proud of that her daughters hadn’t failed her. The three daughters all had a
higher education as she’d expected, including her adopted daughter, with her
full encouragement.
Anna was aware later of one of
the reasons why her mother did this was related to what happened to herself.
Kiku was eager to be educated like her other cousins in the rural small
village. Reaching eleven years old, she then followed her uncle to school, who
took his youngest son with him, to register herself to start her first year at
the only Japanese elementary school in Pongfu Island. Japan colonized Taiwan for about 50 years
until the end of World War II.
For that, Kiku suffered a lot of
hardships to complete her elementary school, but she got it over, and achieved
her own expectations. She was the first and only girl to be literate in her
family when the Japanese colonized Taiwan. Anna could recite the story that Kiku
described so many times that Anna couldn’t get rid of all the details of what
her mother reminded her of. For instance, she walked bare feet for
more than an hour between the school and her home in the chilly winters and in
the heat from the sun and the burning sand paths in summers.
Kiku didn’t say but it was
crystal-clear that education enabled her to read , speak and write in Japanese
and later in Chinese learning on her own not like most Taiwanese women illiterate then.
That fitted Kiku perfectly well
for accompanying her husband in different official or social functions after
her husband worked in Taipei. Speaking mandarin was required to equip with
among the guests, most couples of whom were mainlanders.
Mainlanders, here, were
generally defined people who came to Taiwan from China after World War II.
Anna’s mother was right
about that more education could build up a world for her daughters. That world
should be totally different from hers Kiku could imagine in her mind. She led
an extraordinary life. Her story would be unveiled piece by piece.
Do you
agree with what Kiku believed?
Some topics to
share with you
For
making them more interesting, not too serious, and allowing you to think about
from different angles, I’ve created the dialogues among various roles. Doing
this way might draw forth some reflections from you on them you read.
Career
and family responsibilities for women and men
It is true that among the
different cultures or countries, cultural missteps in the tradition-bound
societies might impede the peace talks or something else.
Indeed, it could apply to what happens to gender differences in general in
Taiwan. Don’t you think so?
In Taiwanese society, success in
education and work which increases a man’s worth as a potential husband may
work probably in just the opposite way for women. Don’t shake your
head because it’s true.
And safe topics between friends
vary from culture to culture. In Taiwan, it is acceptable to discuss about the
income between acquaintances but not relationship especially between
men with those who work together. Men feel uncomfortable to talk about
this. Women might leak some secrets to their close friends or to their colleagues
who get along well with each other. Both genders are all afraid of it that the
rumors will spread around. That might have an impact on their reputation when
it comes to promotion or whatever.
In Taiwanese society, success in
education and work which increases a man’s worth as a potential husband may
work probably in just the opposite way for women. Don’t shake your
head because it’s true.
The fact is that women have
greater pressures placed on them regarding the timing of marriage and childbearing or
responsibility for looking after children and chores. Now, you see what
I’m saying.
Therefore, despite changes in the
composition of the work force working women with family responsibilities have
two jobs one within and the other outside the home. Women have much less free
time than do men in the end.
Women learn gender roles in an
unexamined way to make their men such as brothers, husbands, and sons great.
Nowadays, one might believe that time changes so do people about dealing
with the house chores or child caring. It depends I certainly agree with.
What if you were one of the two, Carol and David?
Carol: Hello.
Sera:
Thank goodness! Where have you been? I tried to reach you for almost six hours.
I made calls almost every twenty minutes on your mobile or landline phone.
You didn’t answer and you know I hate to leave messages in the stupid box.
Carol: What happened? Are you
crying?
Sera: No! Yes, I am. I broke up
with Sean this morning.
Carol:
Calm down, please. Do you want to talk about it or do you want me to go to your
place with Tiny?
Sera: No, I just need to talk to
you. Is it okay with you?
Carol: Sure! I thought you two
love each other if I’m right about this.
Sera: Yes, still. But… (Sera can hear
Tiny crying in the background).
Carol: Sorry, Sera. Could you
wait a second? I need to…
Sera: Yeah! Go and take your
time. I can wait.
Sera can hear Carol is trying to
soothe Tiny, but the baby doesn’t stop crying.
Carol: Sera, are you there?
Sera: Yes, I am. Is everything
all right?
Carol:
I don’t know. I checked his diaper, which isn’t wet, and I just fed him. I
think he’s not feeling well. It should be fine. Now, I’m holding him.
Where were we?
Sera:
I could call you later. You send me a message after you put Tiny into sleep. Is that
okay with you?
Carol: Thanks! Later.
Tiny is sleeping in Carol’s arms.
Every movement she tries to make, which awakes Tiny and makes him cry again.
She gives up putting him back in his bed but stays still in the same chair next
to the telephone. Her arms are getting more and more sore and her feet are falling
asleep. She really hopes that David will be home soon. The telephone rings
again. In a split second, she picks up the phone. Tiny has a frown,
but Carol pats him to get back to sleep and whispers to the phone wedged between her jaw and shoulder.
Carol: Hello.
A
strange female’s voice at the other end of the phone: Hi! May I speak
to John, please?
Carol:
I’m sorry you must have a wrong number. There is no one by that name.
She: But…
Carol: No!
She manages to put the telephone back on the cradle. It is almost seven o’clock. David doesn’t come home yet. Carol finally takes Tiny into his bed with a lot of stuffed animals. She is starving and decides to fix dinner. Around seven thirty, dinner is ready and she sets the table. She felt dead with fatigue. She drops herself on the chair.
She manages to put the telephone back on the cradle. It is almost seven o’clock. David doesn’t come home yet. Carol finally takes Tiny into his bed with a lot of stuffed animals. She is starving and decides to fix dinner. Around seven thirty, dinner is ready and she sets the table. She felt dead with fatigue. She drops herself on the chair.
Out of the corner of her eye, she
sees David appears in the living room. He takes off his jacket, grins and walks
to her. She is annoyed with him for coming home so late.
David:
Hmm, smell wonderful. I thought we might have some take-out for dinner. How’s
Tiny?
Carol:
It took me a long while to put him to sleep, but I think he’s fine. I don’t understand
why it took so long for you to get home. Don’t say again you had a long-hour
meeting. Besides, you didn’t even give me a call. What’s going on tell me!
David:
Yeah, you are right about the meeting with Ruth. After that meeting, we talked a
little while. She mentioned that she would ask you to work on a new on-line project.
Her look tells him not to take it
further about what he’s expecting to say about the offer of her new project.
Carol: I’m asking you what you
did after that.
David:
Don’t be mad with me. Let me finish this. Before I left work, Sean suggested we
have a happy hour. Why not? So, we went to that coffee shop you know on the
corner in front of the bus stop. We just chitchatted for a while. That’s all.
Carol:
A happy hour! Why not! You know Tiny is very demanding and I needed your help
to fix dinner. And you promised it this morning. Did it slip your mind? I really
hate this kind of whining about trifles. You also forgot doing the
dishes last night. I was too tired to complain about how exhausted I was
to do the dishes before fixing dinner. Can you imagine I bathed and fed
Tiny before I did all this on my own? And it’s perfect you had a fun time with
your bro. What about me? I couldn’t even have a talk with Sera on the phone.
She sounded miserable.
David: I’m
terribly sorry and it won’t happen again, really. I know my beautiful wife has
been doing a lot of things for Tiny and me. I’ll make it up to you. Come on! Give
me a hug! Let’s enjoy our lovely dinner. Look at these scrumptious dishes.
Much
to his relief, Carol accepts his apology, and he kisses her on her head. Silent
treatment is not one she is capable of doing.
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