What
if you only have NT$1,000 (US$ 30 or so)? Could you enjoy a day in Taiwan? What
if you afford to spend much more than that, say, US$10,000?
In the South
My
husband and I met, fell in love and married in China. I haven’t been one of
those extroverts. This made me face struggles after I lived with my husband’s parents
in Kaohsiung. If I kept quiet, not saying a word, not a one could tell I am not
Taiwanese. But, most people look at me differently and know right away I came
from China if I speak a couple sentences in Chinese. The accents and the ways
of adopting words are not exactly the same in the two domains, Taiwan and
China.
Not
like foreign brides, who are entitled to have a citizenship in four years, I
waited more than six years to get that one. It is due to the hostile tension
between Taiwan and China. I tried to bend myself to this unfairness anyway.
My
mother-in-law didn’t approve of our marriage when my husband informed them of
seeing me and wanting to marry me. She couldn’t stop it -- what had happened just
happened, but accepted in the end. My father-in-law born in China welcomed me
more enthusiastically than I looked forward to. However, both of them have
helped me to look after my daughters when I run a tiny food court in front of a
small park on weekends and most weekdays.
Making
a living as an engineer, my husband couldn’t support the whole family after my
elder daughter was born. My father-in-law, a retired lieutenant, lives on a pension,
which is very small and kind of subsidiary matter-of-factly. It was obvious
that with one income we couldn’t survive and we might turn to a loan shark,
which was intolerable for us living with debts.
I
started planning to make some money to help my husband when my elder daughter
was one year old. I found myself pregnant shortly after I was selling the
dinner boxes to the elderly who had done their walking or exercising in the
park.
Those
dinner boxes I made for the elderly were gradually attracting more to buy and I
started preparing the lunch boxes too. The numbers of customers have been
growing and their ages have been various too. I buy food from the vendors
directly not going to the market. That saves me more money and time too.
Preparing food and cooking dishes take most of time in the morning and exhaust
my physical strength as well.
My
husband helps me sometimes if he leaves work earlier, so does my
mother-in-law. My father-in-law has become a babysitter and he is happy about
it. It also saves us money without sending my daughters to the kindergarten.
The relationship between me and my mother-in-law becomes better and she also
tries to speak Chinese with me. She tells me to save some money in my bank
account. The neighbors seem friendlier than before and admire me before my
mother-in-law for being a good daughter-in-law.
We
hope we could save some money to pay the down payment for buying a
three-bedroom and two-bathroom apartment, not renting anymore. How much does a ten-year-old
and not fancy apartment cost, around 99.18 M2 (30坪) in Kaohsiung, the biggest harbor city in Taiwan? Generally, it depends on which
section you want to buy it. The place we’re going to look for is reasonable,
and it might be up to NT$2,500,000.00. The down payment is usually around 30%
of the sum, we are working on that with much effort we all put on.
How
much does I earn if I sell a lunch/dinner box? A box costs NT$ 60.00, with a
chicken thigh and two kinds of vegetable and a bowl of rice. The profit I gain is
NT$20.00 or so for each, and it makes NT$ 2,000.00 a day approximately, not worrying about a tax on it for a vendor like me. It’s not too
bad at all, actually better than good though, because sometimes I beat my husband,
whose salary is around NT$35,000.00 with the pay of overworking hours. That is
why he always says he can’t lose me or he loses everything.
It
sounds very comforting to me even though I do feel tired from those trivial things
but important somehow, like changing the way of cooking or comparing the prices for different foods. I don’t see it’s sort of evidence of
vulnerability but a challenge I’ve been willingly to go through.
I
did appreciate that we finally own a second-hand car, which is capable of taking
the whole family out on Sunday afternoon. It’s a special time for us to spend the
whole afternoon for free to enjoy what we do at the Southern District Waste Manage
Plant. It is located in our neighborhood. My parents-in-law lightly bring my daughters
to run in the park or play at the indoor playground, and sometimes watch the cartoon
while my husband and I go swimming in that fabulous 50-meter-long swimming pool.
We
are building our dreams in a way, difficult but fulfilled too, and it also
takes time we do realize. We can make it!
In the North
You
must despise me after you read this. I was and am still the other woman of a
good husband, used to be, and a wonderful father. How could I let this occur if
I had some kind of sense of strict morality or felt guilty of shame at that?
I
was decent somehow if you ask my friends or my colleagues. I’d be
happy to join that argument when it came to the rightness of monogamy. My point
“was” that a wife “was” entitled to owning what “was belonged to” the couple.
Then
I “believed” that almost all the widows outlived their husbands in their
fifties or early forties “end up” being single for the rest of their lives
without bothering marrying another guy. You might give a few examples to deny
what I once believed, who “are” exceptions really.
However, that is a different story for a widow, a husband once who is unfortunately left behind healthy or vulnerable mentally or physically. There should be more than one friend or even an acquaintance voluntarily to offer him seeing or dating some women available to accompany him in case he feels lonely and helpless.
I blurted out what I thought concerning remarrying when it was brought up. What now? What I’ve been doing is much worse than remarrying since it’s my right to lead my own life. But, look at me trying to steal a great guy from an innocent wife!
Couldn’t
I say “No!” first and last, could I? No! You couldn’t have judged me if you had
been me! Why? Let me explain how I wasn’t able to reject the invitation when it
related to a promising promotion or some opportunities of meeting potential
employers. See that was why I went out with this guy, not on a date, of course.
He
was famous for his knowledge in this field and has that good-nature sense of humor,
popular among his friends. I totally felt safe to go out with him to meet his
partner visiting him from China, where I might be working soon because the
extension of our trade with China. And, it turned out all well and his partner
did recruit me to work for him in three months.
I
overlooked what I should have been more careful before I got myself trapped in
this no-turning-back situation. The process of materialism and the days of loneliness
dismantled my whole life piece by piece. I am not the one who I was.
I
enjoy the generous offer from my saver – he was I believed then but question it now. How was the
relationship between an employer and an employee twisted in the way you might
be curious about?
I
worked quite hard even on weekends when I started working in China. I thought I
was responsible to accomplish some errands in a definite period of time. I
actually did pretty well and his partner gave me one week break every month.
That allowed me to visit my parents, who I gave my words to come home as often
as possible.
I
was very pleased with that the salary doubled too. It was NT$120,000.00 with
the extra for travelling and housing in China. It was another NT$ 20,000.00. I
could afford to buy something luxurious, but I did not. I wanted to buy a nice
apartment in Taipei, ten years old probably, which might cost NT$ 600,000.00
for a M2 in an Okay neighborhood. That meant she had to save the
down payment around NT$1,000,000.00 for an apartment, 66.2 M2 worth
NT$12,000,000.00 with a bed-room and one bath-room plus a living room and a
tiny kitchen.
Nothing
particular happened in the first six months when he came to China to have
meetings or some occasions. Sometimes, his wife came with him and they were an
amazing couple I thought.
It
happened on the night he joined me back to Taipei. He upgraded my seat
and we were in the first class, so luxurious and served wonderfully. I did
enjoy the way he chatted with me and I didn’t know why but told him a lot about what I'd like to be without having
a second thought. I remember I mentioned I was looking forward to moving out to live on my own independently in
Taipei instead of staying with my parents in Taipei County. He agreed with what I considered
about the lifestyle.
It was in September, before
I left for China, he called me and said he liked to have a dinner with me. He took me to a restaurant without a name on the outside and only open for its members to
book I knew that later. The music was playing soft and the lighting was
making the design of restaurant look like in a dream, but nothing about
unnecessary extravagance either. I thought he might talk something
about my work, but the whole night he just talked music, movies and sports. I
kind of got lost because I felt so relaxed that I told him why I stayed single…Yes, too ambitious!
The
beautiful waitress wearing a gorgeous smile in a while-black uniform brought
the bill and asked if this should add up under his account. I heard it sounded
like something about NT$10,000.00. I was stunned by it, which was a big sum of
money to rent a one-room-without-window apartment on a narrow street for one
month in Taipei.
Before
I could say a word, he gave me a credit card and told me to pay my flights in
the first class with this card, all on the company. I was reluctant to take it,
but he just smiled and said “You deserve it. Take it. It’s the best because it’s
my authority!” It was out-of-bounds,
but I didn’t decline his offer. I should have known then, without a shadow of a
doubt, that there was something which was changing irreversibly.
To
be frank with you, I thought I took it for granted, but the guilt has been
eating away at me. I don’t know what if he divorces his wife. It sounds too
much for me to carry on at this moment. I’ll see…
Our
dinners and lunches became regular dates in China and things happened just
crazily. I lost control of myself. We, or I, forgot who I was and what I’ve been
doing in a city, where nobody knows me at least. I let myself gone too far to
get myself back on the track, a good one.
Months
later, I received a certificate by mail from one of his lawyers in Taiwan, and
I found I was an owner of a fancy apartment with a car park. Yes, it didn’t surprise
me when I found there was a car waiting for me to turn on the ignition. He bought
me those, and I took them as generous gifts if he really loves me as he always
whispers to me in person or on the phone. Why shouldn’t I?
According
to The Global Wealth Databook 2015, the purple area indicates 61.8% of the whole population are categorized into lower-income groups clustering in the south while the crimson area reveals wealth dominated by 0.1
% of the residents, rich and luxuriously living in the north, shown in the picture below.
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